Peter Banning/Peter Pan
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[trying to rationalize why he can see Tinkerbell] You're a... you're a complex Freudian hallucination having something to do with my mother and I don't know why you have wings, but you have very lovely legs and you're a very nice tiny person and what am I saying? I don't know who my mother was. I'm an orphan and I've never taken drugs because I missed the sixties; I was an accountant.
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Hook, you let those kids out of that net in less than one minute or you better get an attorney and hope to God he's better than me.
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[after Rufio draws his sword] Okay, Mister. All right. Show's over. You
put that thing away! Now put it down before you poke somebody's eye out!
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[unearthing his cell phone] Wow. [opens it and holds it to his ear] Brad! Hi! ...you been holding this long? ...Uh huh. ...Neverland. Lost Boys. James Hook, duel to the death, I'll tell you about it later. Listen, I'd love to chat... but I gotta climb a drain pipe right now. "Why?" Because I ran out of fairy dust, if not I would've flown up.
[hangs up] Pssh, "Why?"
Captain James Hook
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Oh, I hate being disappointed, Smee. And I hate living in this flawed body. And I hate living in Neverland. And I hate, I hate, I
hate Peter Pan!
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[the pirates are playing baseball, and the catcher shoots the runner stealing second] No-no-no! Now stop it! We're playing this game by Master Jack's rules. Bad form! Sit down, now. Let's resume the game.
[to the lady next to him] Very violent sport, isn't it, baseball?
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You know you're not really Peter Pan, don't you? This is only a dream. When you wake up, you'll just be Peter Banning - a cold, selfish man who drinks too much, is obsessed with success, and runs and hides from his wife and children.
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[In a suicidal funk, he appears having fetched his pistol] No stopping me this time, Smee. This is it. Don't make a move Smee, not a step. My finger's on the trigger. Don't try to stop me, Smee!
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Smee: Oh, not again.
Captain Hook: This is it. Don't try to stop me this time, Smee. Don't try to stop me this time, Smee. Don't you dare try to stop me this time, Smee, try to stop me. Smee, you'd better get up off your ass. Get over here, Smee! Stop me! Don't you understand this is not a joke, I'm committing suicide!
[Wrestles for the gun with Smee. The gun goes off, setting a model ship on fire.] Don't ever frighten me like that again. What are you, some kind of sadist?
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Fools, James Hook
is Neverland!
[corners Peter and prepares to impale him with his hook] Whenever children read, it will say "
Thus perished Peter Pan."
Granny Wendy/Wendy Darling
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[Maggie says that Jack told her Wendy is not the "real" Wendy] Ahh. Well, do you see where Jack is? That is the same window and this is the same room where we made up bedtime stories telling about Peter, Neverland, and scary old Captain Hook. But did you know that Mr. Barrie... well, Sir James, our neighbor, he loved our stories so much that he wrote them all down in a book... oh dear me... eighty years ago.
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The stories are true! I swear to you! I swear to you on everything I hold dear! And now he's come back to seek his revenge. The fight isn't over for Captain James Hook. He wants you back. He knows that you'll follow Jack and Maggie to the ends of the earth and beyond. And by heavens, you must find a way. Only you can save your children. Somehow, you must go back. You must make yourself remember.
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Peter: Remember what?
Wendy: Peter, don't you know who you are?
[turns the page of a storybook to reveal an illustration of Peter Pan]
Wendy: (As Peter is stunned/confused at the meaning) Yes boy.... yes. (verifying her meaning)
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[Peter remembers the last time he came for Wendy] Peter, I can't come with you. I've forgotten how to fly. I'm old, Peter. Ever so much more than twenty. I grew up a long time ago.
Mr. Smee
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[A man sweeping garbage in a London park looks suspiciously like Mr. Smee]
[to Peter, who is laying down in the snow] Hallo! Having trouble with the missus? Well, you will have by the time you get home.
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Good morning, Neverland! Tie down the main mast, mateys, because here he is! The cunning kingfish! The bad barracuda! A man so deep, he's almost unfathomable.
[Silence, as they fail to understand] A man so quick, he's even fast asleep!
[Laughter] Thank you!! Now let's give him a big hand - 'cause he's only got one. I give you, the steel-handed stingray, Captain James Hook!
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[To Hook, who doesn't believe Peter's the real Peter Pan] He's Peter Pan alright, Captain... He's just been away from Neverland so long, his mind's been "Junk-tified." He's forgotten
everything. Others
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Moira Banning: Your children love you, they want to play with you. How long do you think that lasts? Soon Jack might not even want you to come to his games. We have a few special years with our children, when they're the ones that want us around. After that you're going to be running after them for a bit of attention. It's so fast Peter. Just a few years, and it's over. And you are not being careful. And you are missing it.
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Tinkerbell:
[In tears, after Peter fails to fly] It
is true, then. You
did grow up. I drank poison for you. You use to call me "Tink." Have you forgotten
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Tinkerbell: You know that place between sleep and awake, the place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you, Peter Pan. That's where I'll be waiting.
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Pockets:
[pressing on Peter's face to smooth the wrinkles and see if it's really him, and finally pulling the corners of his lips up to make him smile] Oh, there you are, Peter!
Dialogue
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Peter Banning: What's the deal? Where's the real food?
Tinkerbell: If you can't imagine yourself being Peter Pan, you won't
be Peter Pan, now eat up.
Peter Banning: Eat what? There's nothing here. Gandhi ate more than this.
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[
the Bannings have arrived at Wendy's house. They knock on the door, and are answered by a senile old man, Tootles]
Peter Banning: Uncle Tootles...
Tootles: [
completely ignoring the Bannings] It's snowing!
[
he slams the door in their faces, Jack laughs hysterically and chokes on his gum]
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Captain Hook: You bet against me bringing Pan back here, didn't ya?
Pirate: No.
Captain Hook: Aw, tell your captain the truth.
[pirate starts to cry] Aww, say it. Say it.
Pirate: I did.
Captain Hook: Yes, you made a boo-boo.
Pirate:
[nods] I did. I did!
Captain Hook: The Boo Box.
Pirate: Not that! Not the Boo Box! NOO!!
[he is then locked into a chest filled with scorpions.] Partager la citation sur facebook
Thud Butt: I remember Tootles.
Peter Pan: How could you remember Tootles?
Thud Butt: He was a lost boy. These are his marbles.
[hands Peter a bag] These are his happy thoughts.
Peter Pan:
[laughs] He really did lose his marbles, didn't he?
Thud Butt:
[laughs with Peter] Yeah, he lost them good.
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Peter: I want to speak to a grown-up!
Rufio: All grown-ups are pirates.
Peter: Excuse me?
Rufio: We kill pirates.
Peter Pan: I'm not a pirate. It so happens, I'm a lawyer.
Rufio: Kill the lawyer!
Lost Boys: Kill the lawyer!
Peter Pan: I'm not that kind of lawyer!
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Peter: No-no! Please stop! Why are you doing this to me?!
[falls in the flower garden]
Tinker Bell: Rufio, you're the best with a sword. Please teach him. We gotta make him remember.
Peter:
[A daffodil sniffs at Peter's face. Other sunflowers are now sniffing at Peter. More daffodils sniff at his crotch.] Excuse me!
[Hits the daffodil, it sneezes.]
Peter and
Lost Boys: Help me!
Peter and
Lost Boys: Not you!
[Peter Pan with arrow shot by rear end] Partager la citation sur facebook
Peter:
[he and Rufio are having an insult fight] Substitute chemistry teacher!
Lost Boy: C'mon Rufio, hit him back!
Rufio: Mung tongue!
Peter: Math tutor.
Rufio: Pinhead!
Peter: Prison Barber.
Rufio: Mother lover!
Peter: Nearsighted gynecologist.
Rufio: In your face, camel cake!
Peter: In your rear, cow derriere!
Rufio: Lying, crying, spying, prying ultra-pig!
Peter: You lewd, crude, rude, bag of pre-chewed food, dude!
Thud: Bangerang, Peter!!!
[the rest of the Lost Boys cheer for Peter]
Rufio:
[losing confidence] You-- You man! Stupid, stupid man!
Peter: Hey, Rufio, if I'm a maggot burger, why don't you just
EAT ME!? You two-toned, zebra headed, slime-coated, pimple-farming, paramecium brain, munching-on-your-own-mucus, suffering from
PETER PAN ENVY!!!
Lost Boy: What's a paramecium brain?
Peter: I'll tell you what a paramecium is!
[points at Rufio] THAT'S a paramecium! It's a one-celled critter WITH NO BRAIN THAT CAN'T FLY!
[to Rufio] Don't mess with me, man!
I'M A LAWYER!!!
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Smee: I've just had an apostrophe.
Captain Hook: I think you mean an epiphany.
Smee: Lightning... just struck my brain.
Captain Hook: Well, that must hurt.
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Peter Pan:
[to the lost boys] Let's get ready to show them the white light we're made of, boys.
Captain Hook:
[to the pirates] Remember the fires of hell that forged you, charge!
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Captain Hook: Peter. I swear to you wherever you go, wherever you are, I vow there will always be daggers buried in notes signed James Hook. They will be flung into doors of your children's children's children, do you hear me?
Peter Pan: What do you want, old man?
Captain Hook: Just you.
Peter Pan: You've got me, James Hook.
[flies back] Pan the Avenger has returned.
Captain Hook: And the Hook is waiting.
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Captain James Hook: Hear me, men. For reasons of good form, I have decided that this so-called Pan will return in three days to commence the arbitrament of the sword. Smee, translate.
Smee: In three days, we're gonna have a war! A battle between good and evil to the death!
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Peter Banning: Uh...
[whispers in Hook's ear]
Captain Hook: I beg your pardon?
Peter:
[whispers again]
Captain Hook: You
must be joking.
[to other pirates; laughs] Peter Pan has a real problem with heights.
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[last lines]
Wendy Moira Angela Darling/ Granny Wendy: So... your adventures are over.
Peter: Oh, no. To live... to live would be an awfully big adventure.
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Hook: I want to die.
Smee: Oh, captain...
Hook: There's no adventure here.
Smee: (Motioning to Hook's flintlock pistol) You call THIS no adventure?
Hook: Death is the only great adventure I have left.
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Captain Hook: Prepare to die Peter.
Peter Pan: To die will be a great adventure.
Captain Hook: Death is the only adventure you have left.
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Wendy Darling: Boy? Why are you crying?
Peter Pan:
[Getting up, from his position on the floor] What's your name?
Wendy Darling: Wendy Moira Angela Darling... what's yours?
[A young Wendy, is sat up, in her bed, a thin, white, flower patterned, bed quilt, is held in front of her by her left arm, her head is titled to it's left, and she is smiling]
Peter Banning:
[The window, to Wendy's bedroom, opens, with a gust of wind, as the voiceover continues] I came back many times for Wendy. Always in the spring.
[a clip of Wendy, in her 20s; she calls "Peter!" as she turns to him and happily, smiles, closing her book. Wendy has a white ribbon tied in the back of her hair, it cascades down her back] And Wendy kept getting older
[followed by another clip of Wendy in her 40s smiling at him, as she looks up and closes her book. Wendy is wearing a pair of small, white earrings, and a white shirt], and older
[a clip of Wendy in her 70s, hair red. Young Peter places a hand on her shoulder] and then I came back... one last time.
Wendy: Peter, I can't come with you. I've forgotten how to fly.
[Wendy looks up and closes the book she is reading; Peter starts in horror] I'm old Peter. Ever so much more than twenty.
[Wendy removes her glasses] I grew up a long time ago
[Peter, moving to the window, protests with a cry of "No, no, no! You promised!"] I have children of my own now, and they have children of their own. That's my grandchild, Moira, asleep in the bed.
[On the word "Moira" she smiles, and she and Peter look over at the sleeping girl.]
Peter Banning: When I saw here lying there sleeping, that moment, something changed in me forever.
Peter Pan: I shall give her a kiss.
Wendy: No! No, Peter! No buttons! No thimbles!
[Gets out of the chair, and takes Peter by the arm] I couldn't bear Moira's heart to be broken, when she finds she can't keep you.
Peter Pan:
[He sits on the side of Moira's bed, and looks down towards her] No. I mean... a real kiss
[He leans in, and kisses Moira on the lips. Wendy anxiously looks on; Tink flies down to the window and looks in. Seeing Peter kisssing Moira, her light dims, her wings flatten behind her and she looks sad, as the thimble, which had been on Peter's finger, falls to the floor, spinning on the spot... forgotten. Peter Pan has grown up.] Partager la citation sur facebook
Granny Wendy/ Wendy Moira Angela Darling [Wendy opens a book, pointing to a picture of her; it's a familiar picture, one we all recognise; it's her, aged twelve, looking out of her nursery window, watching Hook's ship, with Peter on board, float by] I'm Wendy... or I was, a long time ago.
Maggie: But Jack says you're not the really "real" Wendy
Granny Wendy/ Wendy Moira Angela Darling: Ahh. Well, do you see where Jack is? That is the same window and this is the same room where we made up bedtime stories about Peter, Neverland, and scary old Captain Hook. But did you know that Mr. Barrie... well, Sir James, our neighbor, he loved our stories so much that he wrote them all down in a book... oh dear me... eighty years ago.
Maggie: You're really old.
Wendy: That's very true.
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Peter: (phone rings) I have to take this. (answers phone in front of surprised Moria) Brad? Ever wondered what it feels like in the air when you fly? Feel THIS! (throws phone out window)
Moira: (happy) Where have you been? (hugs Peter)
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