Tony Gardella
Nicole Oliver
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I can't have sex with you! My body belongs to my husband and there is no way that I could betray him in that way. But what I do from the neck up is a different story.
Lee Simon
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One minute you're in the lunchroom at Glenwood High and you fucking blink and you're 40, you blink again and you can see movies at half price on a senior citizen's pass. Ask not for whom the bell tolls, or to put it more accurately, ask not for whom the toilet flushes.
Robin Simon
Donald Trump
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Well, I'm working on buying St. Patrick's Cathedral, maybe doing a little rip-down job and putting up a very very tall and beautiful building.
Dialogue
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Bonnie: Apparently his first two books...
Lee: They were obliterated. I got the 3 esses: self-indulgent, sophomoric, solipsistic...
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Tony: Oh, and getting out of the elevator I see there's a famous critic.
Robin: Him, I recognize.
Tony: Oh, he used to hate every movie. Then, he married a young, big-bosomed woman, and now he loves every movie.
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Supermodel: You're not afraid of catching germs? And you know, I'm coming down with a cold and everything...
Lee: From you I'd be willing to catch terminal cancer.
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Waiting Room Nurse: I'm sorry, the doctor just doesn't do penis enlargements. We don't have the space.
Waiting Room Patient: We're talking about 3 inches here!
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Robin: There aren't any ticks around here, are there? I'd hate to get Lyme disease.
Priest at Catholic Retreat: We haven't had any casualties.
Cast
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